(My) Marriage is a BIG Deal!


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Weddings and funerals seem to bring out some of the most interesting conversations, emotions and sayings.  People say the darnedest things and their actions can be not so acceptable too. With death and funerals I can understand why people can sort of get away with saying rude things to relatives. Emotions are raging and folks aren’t thinking straight. I can’t quite figure out what is it about weddings that make people coo coo for Cocoa Puffs.  The stresses that come with being the bride and/or groom are understandable.  Why anyone else should get a pass is beyond me?

For the four months I have been engaged I have heard some of the most interesting comments regarding marriage:

                            “Why are you wasting money on a wedding?”

                              “Being a fiancé is nothing but a glorified girlfriend”

                             “ I hope you guys last”

 I can go on and on but I will spare you the gory details.

What I have come to realize is, marriage is highly underrated. We live in a society where marriage is a mirage of sorts. It’s highly uncommon unless same sex marriage is the topic of discussion. We don’t speak highly enough about marriage.

Most have preconceived notions that marriage is equivalent to that of imprisonment ( ball and chain). Some have experienced and/or are products of failed marriages and carry on the assumption that all marriages will eventually fail.

Others neglect to walk down the aisle because of the fear of failure.Some avoid it because they are lazy and aren’t willing to do the work it takes to live happily married.

It’s hard not to take the things that are said to me regarding (my) upcoming nuptials personally. The truth of the matter is it stings a little. It leaves me to wonder if the amount of support or the lack thereof can be attributed to the negative connotations of marriage. Or maybe marriage is just so rare these days that people don’t know how to support an engaged couple.

Somewhere down the line marriage has become an unpopular decision made by a small number hopeful romantics. This has not changed my attitude about walking down the aisle. In fact, the naysayers motivate me even more. They make me more determined to make “it” work. Not just to prove them wrong but prove it myself that it is possible.

Contrary to populate belief, marriage is a big deal! It’s HUGE. It’s biblical. God honors (godly) marriages. Marriage is a covenant between two people who love each other and who love God. It is meant for a lifetime and not to be taken lightly. I truly believe that if it is handled with sincere diligence and love it will be blessed. To me it is worth more than just making an appointment at the Justice of the Peace out of convenience.  It’s a big deal. It should require more thought to it than Vegas so my guests can drink and gamble after.

Marriage is sacred and should be treated as such. And while it goes far beyond a wedding day, I think people forget that that special day plays a part in one of the most important life decisions one makes.

My fiancé and I have faced some opposition. We have not received the support we thought were going to but it is not stopping is.  Early in our courtship it was revealed to us that our relationship was called to exemplify the standard of a godly marriage. We know that God has specifically called us to be an example of God’s love for his people through our marriage. We know people are looking for couples to restore hope in marriage and I am now resting on the fact that as we are obedient to this specific calling, God will honor us individually and as a married couple. It’s is our prayer that as we embark on this journey to marriage, the love of and for God in our union will be displayed and begin to soften hearts and open minds towards marriage.

Marriage is and should always be a big deal.




**keep up with my journey to the aisle on www.aaronandminah.com **

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  1. Absolutely! Marriage is and should be forever and it is so sad that others don’t have that viewpoint. I’m sorry you have had to face so much negativity.

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